Welcome to your community service sentence. My name is Matt. Don't let the fact that my mom just dropped me off for my work shift undermine your respect for my authority. I am your warden. You will answer to me.
First off, your work here will be hard. And backbreaking. And difficult. For the next two hours you will answer to me. When I say, "Jump," you will jump. When I say, "Rake," you will rake. When I say, "Hey guys, check out my new Gameboy!" you will say, "Wow, Matt, that's cool. What games do you have?"
I'm the warden. I am in charge here. Things will be done MY way. Do you hear me? MY way. Or...if you have a very good suggestion for another way to do things then maybe we can do things your way. Got it? My way...or maybe your way. Or maybe we can incorporate the two. Some my way and some your way.
And one more thing. Don't even think about making a break for it. The only way out of community service is in a body bag, or when your mom picks you up in her nice warm mini-van at 9:00.
All right men. Get raking.
Go ahead and click on the teeny envelope icon and send this post to a friend. Don't be jerky and claim that you wrote it because I wrote it, damn it.