Sondra Stinglash Gets All Topical On Your Ass

Check out the pic. (That's the way cool people say "picture.") It's Sondra Stinglash, being interrupted by Kanye West. Funny isn't it? I thought so...and topical too. Especially if you pretend like the three weeks that have passed since the VH-1 music awards never really happened.

Here is what he is saying, btw...

Yo Stinglash! I'm happy for you and Imma let you finish and I'm not saying your moves are bad, but Kurt has the best signature move of all time.

Sting! I'm happy for you and Imma let you finish. Those pants are pretty reckless, but the OptimistPessimist has bought the most reckless outfit of all time.

Hey Sondra! I'm happy for you and Imma let you finish and your goats are finely dressed and all, but Nanny Goats in Panties has the most fabulously dressed up goats of all time.

I could go on. Maybe you have some of them. We could have a little contest. What would Kanye West say to Sondra Stinglash? You write a quote and leave it as a comment and I will pick my favorite and announce the winner on Callithump Thunderblog and make a blog award and everything. Except I won't make a blog award. I am lazy like that.

I really don't write about topical stuff much here on Callithump. I would like to but my very loose grasp on anything that is going on in the world makes it impossible. Basically, I get my news from my Facebook friends' status messages. And from tweets. If it's important enough, it will be tweeted. Of course, if it isn't important, it will also be tweeted.

So there's that.


I have a cold. And as typical for me, it rarely stops there. My colds tend to be compounded by other things. In my usual fashion, this cold is accompanied by a fantasy of a cheerful manservant who brings me tea and soup and fluffs my pillow and tells me jokes on demand.

Sondra Stinglash: Tell me a joke.

Manservant: What’s the difference between a gynecologist and a plumber?

Sondra Stinglash: I dunno. Tell me.

Manservant: A gynecologist is a physician specializing in the treatment of women, whereas a plumber is a skilled tradesman who specializes in pipes and drains and such.

Sondra Stinglash: That's not really a joke is it?

(I stole that unjoke from here. Unjokes are funny in that they aren't really funny. They sound like jokes, but they aren't jokes, but then again they are. See how that works?)

My cheerful manservant with the odd sense of humor is dressed up in a tuxedo. A tuxedo you say? Sure. Why not? It's my fantasy and when I fantasize I go all out, sparing no expense. I do things right. Not like your grade B fantasies.

Yo 'Lash. I'm happy for you and Imma let you finish, but the Cat Lady has the best fantasies of all time.

OK, so the Cat Lady didn't write a post about fantasies. Still, no matter what Edna, my annoying inner editor, says, I am keeping the link. The Cat Lady is worth visiting anyhow. She has all kinds of fun stuff over there.


And I won another award! I am terrible at claiming awards, but I am gonna try real hard and post an acceptance post on this one sometime real soon. That will require my digging deep into my psyche to reveal my obsessions. That shouldn't be too hard, actually. These are things I have. Obsessions. And a psyche.

Thank you Skye at Weekly Injection Of Chuckles for the awarding me the "Your Blog Is Fabulous" award!


I got a new car and I love it and it is red. And it's mine. This means that the car shopping is over which means that the car shopping stories are over. But it doesn't mean that I didn't score my very own souvenir Larry the Frog wind up action figure. It doesn't mean that at all, because I did. Looky here at what it does.

Isn't it great? Just like Larry the Frog...

It does nothing!

Hey Larry the Frog! I'm happy for you and Imma gonna let you finish. But Kermit the Frog totally doesn't suck like you do.

Cue Video.

Kermy is awesome. Don't listen to those cantankerous old men.

Go ahead and click on the teeny envelope icon and send this post to a friend. Don't be jerky and claim that you wrote it because I wrote it, damn it.

6 Response to "Sondra Stinglash Gets All Topical On Your Ass"

  • Says:

    Yo, Stinglash! I'm happy for you and Imma let you finish but I just gotta say, that Kermit is bitchin' and that's a shitload of news you just laid on us and I'm not sure I'm takin' it all in at once, if you be down with that, biatch. And that CatLady may not be havin' too many fantasies these days, but you know that bitch be havin' a tough time and all, what with not gettin' a new car or the $40K the old bitch what got tased got. But Kurt does have the best signature move of all time. I'm thinkin' we can all agree on that.

  • Sugar Says:

    I loved the Kermit video! That was HIGHlarious! (Sorry, I can't think of anything funny to say. I guess that's why I read your blog!)

  • NJ Pigno Says:

    Yo 'Lady- Ain't Kermy grand? And he's got some good moves in that video. I think we can all agree on that too.

    Yo Sugar- The Kermit video is kind of like prozac. I use it like that anyhow.

  • Optimistic Pessimist Says:

    wooohooo congrats on your new car.

    and my outfit really is reckless, but i have determined it's a good thing 'cause i run faster so people can't really focus on the outfit. it is comfy though!

  • NJ Pigno Says:

    OP- Of course it's a good thing! Keep running fast! And thanks about the car. Did I mention that it is red? I heart my car. Now I don't feel so bad about not having an iphone.

  • Nanny Goats In Panties Says:

    I'm probably too late for the contest and I should be disqualified anyway, cuz NGIP is already in one of YOUR quotes.

    THANK YOU for that, by the way - I loved it!!!!

    I can also definitely appreciate the unjokes.

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