You Be The Decider

Sondra Stinglash is not my real name. My real name, as you already know, is nanodance, given to me by parents who were too poor to afford capital letters or a proper last name but at the same time, incredibly forward thinking enough to give me a name that would work nicely as a username on the internet, years before the computer was even invented.

Nanodance (I can afford capital letters these days, but barely) has a wonderful boyfriend who has made it entirely unnecessary for her to date herself as was her habit before he came along. I had assumed that Sondra Stinglash, like Nanodance, was not married, but lately I have been wondering if Sondra Stinglash should, in fact, be married. Here are the pros and cons, as I see it.

Pros: If Sondra Stinglash were married, she could write stories about Mr. Stinglash, who she would affectionately refer to as "Mr. Stinglash." She could write about Mr. Stinglash's toaster collection and how he stays out in the garage every night working on his life size model of a really, really small train set. She could start her posts with the folksy, "Me and Mr. Stinglash...." This could be very endearing.

Cons: Most of the people who follow Callithump Thunderblog do so because they are smitten with Sondra Stinglash's charm and fetching good looks. These followers make a habit of commenting that Sondra Stinglash looks like a sexy librarian, a sexy lunch lady or a sexy 3rd grade teacher. (The sexy part, while not stated explicitly, is implied.)

And who can blame them?

These followers, numbering in the hundreds, all following privately so as not to cause any domestic arguments, most likely would not want to hear all about Mr. Stinglash.

So what do you think, dear reader? Should Sondra Stinglash be married or not? You be the decider. You will find the official voting poll conveniently located right on this very blog! Look to the right and up. (Unless you ARE the computer, and in that case you would look to the left.)

Go ahead and click on the teeny envelope icon and send this post to a friend. Don't be jerky and claim that you wrote it because I wrote it, damn it.

5 Response to "You Be The Decider"

  • Says:

    So, you're considering bringing Mr. Stinglash out of the closet. Have you ever considered that he might just be Sondra's beau, rather than her spouse. In which case he could have an entirely different name. For example: Mr. Studmuffin, (if he's sexy,) or Mr. Bates, (if he has a stuffed mother,) or Mr. Sebastian, (if he comes from a long line of valets.) There are just so many possibilities. Or, he could simply be MyBeau.

    Think of all the intrigue that could go on if MyBeau and Sondra were just sweethearts.

    Just wanted to throw that out there.

  • Jewel Says:

    Or if the whole "significant other" thing is too burdensome, since these folks do have the annoying habit of thinking for themselves -- even if fictional -- perhaps Sondra Stinglash could have a split personality? Rife with possibilities as well...

    I love ending comments with ...s, by the way...

  • NJ Pigno Says:

    Cat Lady- Interesting Idea. I especially like Mr. Bates.

    Jewel- I think that S.S. already has a split personality.

  • julochka Says:

    sondra is indeed a hottie and i love her glasses. but i'm on the fence about whether there's a mr. stinglash..hmm...

  • Boris G. Says:

    I can only propose so many times without giving up. Who am I kidding. Sondra?... (ungracefully shifts his weight to one knee)I have something to ask you...

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